Will your relationship survive? Take our quiz

We all like to believe that our relationship will stand the long haul. And there are many clues that can indicate that your partnership will survive and go the distance. But, equally, there may be signs that your relationship could be stuck in a rut and might not last.

It takes commitment to make a relationship work. So if you feel unfulfilled in your relationship, take our quiz to find out whether it’s likely to survive. Then read on for some tips on how to rekindle the flame.

Take our relationship test! 

Does your relationship need a boost? To find out, answer the following two sets of questions.

Set 1

1. Do you trust your partner? Not only in the sense of being faithful but also that they’re always supportive and have your back?

2. Do you share similar goals?

3. Are you physically intimate? It’s not just about sex, but whether you often reach out to touch or hug one another.

4. Can you communicate openly and honestly?

5. Do you still like your partner even when you’re angry with them?

6. Do you have fun and laugh together?

7. Can you fully be yourself in this relationship?

Set 2

8. Has the spark gone out of your sex life?

9. Do you find you have the same arguments repeatedly?

10. Do you feel underappreciated or take your partner for granted?

11. Do you have different aims in life?

12. Do you feel unable to be completely yourself in the relationship?

13. Has the routine of everyday life (chores, looking after the kids etc.) taken its toll on your relationship?

14. Do you no longer communicate with one another or express your feelings?

15. Has the romance faded as the dirty dishes and laundry pile up?

Results:

These questions were divided into two sets. If you answered "Yes" to the questions in the first set, there’s little doubt that your relationship is built to last.

But if you responded "Yes" to the second set of questions, your relationship has likely got stale, and you’re stuck in a rut.

Maybe you feel that it’s time to end the relationship and move on - and that’s fine as well. But if you want to rekindle the spark, try the following tips.

Tips to reset your relationship

• Schedule a weekly date night. It gives you the time and space to relax and reconnect away from your daily routine.
• Escape for a weekend. Instead of always going on family holidays, make space for yourselves. This will give you the chance to see your partner in a different light instead of always in their role as a parent.
• Boost your libido. There are numerous reasons why you might be feeling a lack of desire for your partner, from tiredness to hormonal imbalances. Bach Flower Mix 41 not only stimulates the libido, but it can also help to overcome performance anxiety and build a positive self-image.
• Reduce screen time. Turn off the TV and your other devices for half an hour every day. Doing this gives you time to pay attention to each other and catch up on your day’s events.
• Do something together. Sharing hobbies and interests or learning something new together can help to keep your relationship warm and engaged.
• If you feel you’re drifting apart, tell your partner how you feel. If you believe your needs are not being met, sit down and work out if there are any changes you could make to improve your relationship.
• Avoid blame and use “I” rather than “You” when talking to your partner about your feelings. For example, rather than saying,” You never pay me attention”, turn the statement back on to how you feel, by saying “ I feel we’re becoming less connected, and I want to feel close to you again”. Blaming your partner will only make them defensive and will not improve communication between the two of you.
• If you find you often argue about the same old stuff, try to look at the issues from your partner’s perspective. Understanding their point of view can help you to achieve a compromise and move forward.
• If arguments get out of hand, try to avoid saying things in a temper that you might regret later. Instead, walk away and take some time out to cool down and consider the problem rationally. Then, when you’ve had time to think things over, you’ll be able to discuss the issue with your partner more calmly.
• Discussing your relationship issues with an impartial third party can help you look at things from a different perspective and gain clarity. Couples counselling can be very beneficial if you find you keep coming up against the same barriers. A counsellor can also suggest ways to improve communication between you and offer suggestions to boost your relationship.

Over to you!

If you’ve been honest with the answers you gave to our quiz, you can now decide on your next steps. Maybe you’re no longer on the same path as your partner, and you’ll decide it’s time to move on. But if you feel your relationship is worth preserving, you will be able to turn things around as long as you’re both prepared to work at it.

Sources:

https://psychcentral.com/blog/7-relationship-maintenance-tips-for-healthy-couples

https://www.relate.org.uk/

Other articles

Is your sex life putting your relationship at risk?

Sexual desire is a complex interaction of hormones, emotions and well-being. When your partner is not as interested in sex as you are, it’s rarely a rejection of you as a person. So it’s essential to be as empathetic as you can regarding your differing libidos.

Do We Label Too Fast?

Nowadays, it can sometimes seem almost everyone has a mental health issue or learning disorder. But, are we too quick to label people, or is it that we are more aware of the problems? This article looks at some of the issues surrounding these sensitive questions.

Isn't depression just a fancy word for feeling a bit down?

Mental health issues such as depression and anxiety affect around 1 in 6 people at some stage of their life. Despite it being such a common problem, many sufferers wait months or even years before seeking help.

Why it's never too late to change

People always think: that’s just me. I'm not good at 'X', that is just my character. Here are some reasons why it's never too late to change.

Hiding a depression: find out if someone you know - or you yourself! - is doing this

It's not always easy to tell if someone has depression. While some signs such as sadness, pessimism and withdrawal from social interaction are easy to recognise, other symptoms may be less obvious. And some people are very good at hiding their depression - even from themselves!

Fact or fiction? Is it truly healthy?

There's so much contradictory health advice out there, it gets confusing. One year, butter is said to be bad for you, and margarine is better. The following year, it's the other way around. One article says running causes strain on your joints; another says it's good for you because it increases bone strength.

Why not me?

It's natural to compare our own lives with those of others - weighing up the pros and cons of situations helps us make decisions. But there can be a downside when you find you're constantly comparing yourself with others, envying their seemingly perfect lives and wondering why they are luckier, more prosperous, and better looking than you.

Do you expect too much from others?

Do you expect more from others than they are prepared to give? Signs that you may be asking too much - and how to break the pattern.

Is it OCD? Find out!

While you often hear people joking that they have OCD because they like to keep their house clean and tidy, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder can be a distressing and debilitating mental health condition with a wide range of symptoms.

Subtle signs your child is unhappy

According to figures from the World Health Organisation, more than 260 million people worldwide suffer from depression. And it's not only adults who are diagnosed with this illness. Children as young as three or four years old can experience depression.