Bach Flower Advice

Letting go of the past: 5 tips

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Lynn Anderson told it very nicely in her song “I beg your pardon; I never promised you a rose garden”. Life isn’t all roses and everybody experiences something they would rather not once in their life.

Typically, we’ll all need a bit of time to process things after a negative experience. But we go on again after a bit of time. Sometimes negative experiences of the past can put on such a weight that it can cause a burden many years later. In such a case, we can speak of “not being able to let go of the past”. Nevertheless, life with nasty things from the past can make a heavy impact; and not only on our mood but also our general wellbeing.

How do you let go of the past?

  1. To be able to let go of the past, you have to know for yourself that there are some memories you’d rather not have. Don’t try to evade these memories. To be able to let go of them, you firstly need to accept them.
     
  2. The seconds step connects with the first step. You have nasty memories that make your life miserable. But these memories are over and are not in the present. In others words, these memories exist, but you can ban the emotions that went with them.
     
  3. Don’t think too quickly that step 2 worked for you. We like to deceive ourselves in thinking we master our emotions. Because of this faulty thinking, resentment of what went on in the past only grows.
     
  4. Don’t be afraid of the truth. It’s a great relief if you can tell the truth about the past. Okay, this may be hurtful; but hiding the truth hurts you. That’s why you have to try and calmly accept the truth without too many emotions.
     
  5. Directly related to step 4, you should know that there should be no artificial sympathy between the person or people you’re having a problem with. Let them know what they’ve done wrong.

So it all comes down to letting people know in an open, honest and preferably calm way what’s bothering you. Only when the past lessons are wiped out from the blackboard can you write a new future.
A handy and healthy tool for letting go of your emotions is the use of Bach flower remedies. These are natural products, which have no side effects at all. Consulting an experienced Bach flower therapist will allow you to get a custom made mix that will deal with all your problems and will allow you to let go of the past.

Created by Tom Vermeersch ()

Tom Vermeersch

Tom Vermeersch is a certified Psychologist and Bach flower expert with more than 30 years of experience.

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Letting go of the past: 5 tips

Letting go of the past: 5 tips
verleden-loslaten

Lynn Anderson told it very nicely in her song “I beg your pardon; I never promised you a rose garden”. Life isn’t all roses and everybody experiences something they would rather not once in their life.

Typically, we’ll all need a bit of time to process things after a negative experience. But we go on again after a bit of time. Sometimes negative experiences of the past can put on such a weight that it can cause a burden many years later. In such a case, we can speak of “not being able to let go of the past”. Nevertheless, life with nasty things from the past can make a heavy impact; and not only on our mood but also our general wellbeing.

How do you let go of the past?

  1. To be able to let go of the past, you have to know for yourself that there are some memories you’d rather not have. Don’t try to evade these memories. To be able to let go of them, you firstly need to accept them.
     
  2. The seconds step connects with the first step. You have nasty memories that make your life miserable. But these memories are over and are not in the present. In others words, these memories exist, but you can ban the emotions that went with them.
     
  3. Don’t think too quickly that step 2 worked for you. We like to deceive ourselves in thinking we master our emotions. Because of this faulty thinking, resentment of what went on in the past only grows.
     
  4. Don’t be afraid of the truth. It’s a great relief if you can tell the truth about the past. Okay, this may be hurtful; but hiding the truth hurts you. That’s why you have to try and calmly accept the truth without too many emotions.
     
  5. Directly related to step 4, you should know that there should be no artificial sympathy between the person or people you’re having a problem with. Let them know what they’ve done wrong.

So it all comes down to letting people know in an open, honest and preferably calm way what’s bothering you. Only when the past lessons are wiped out from the blackboard can you write a new future.
A handy and healthy tool for letting go of your emotions is the use of Bach flower remedies. These are natural products, which have no side effects at all. Consulting an experienced Bach flower therapist will allow you to get a custom made mix that will deal with all your problems and will allow you to let go of the past.


Marie Pure

Other articles


Why not me

Why not me?

It's natural to compare our own lives with those of others - weighing up the pros and cons of situations helps us make decisions. But there can be a downside when you find you're constantly comparing yourself with others, envying their seemingly perfect lives and wondering why they are luckier, more prosperous, and better looking than you.

Read the complete article

Top 5 nonsensical reasons to have doubts about yourself

Top 5 nonsensical reasons to have doubts about yourself

It happens to everyone at times: we start doubting ourselves. We worry about the decisions and whether we can face future challenges that life has in store. And sometimes we feel that we just aren't good enough.

Read the complete article

Do you think too much Or too little

Do you think too much? Or too little?

Feel like you overthink too much? Having a hard time making decisions? Or feel like you don’t consider your options enough? Find out how to strike a balance.

Read the complete article

7 Reasons Why Your Child is Underperforming

7 Reasons Why Your Child is Underperforming

As parents, we often worry about a poor school report as much, if not more, as our kids do! And if your child's grades are slipping, you'll be looking for reasons and if there's anything you can do to help.

Read the complete article

Signs of depression under the radar

Signs of depression under the radar

It is not always obvious when someone is experiencing depression. Some people with depression mask their symptoms, hiding their feelings behind a smile to convince others they are happy.

Read the complete article

Can you accept things you can't change Take our quiz!

Can you accept things you can't change? Take our quiz!

Your relationship ends, or you lose your job, and you get stuck in a rut of negative thoughts and suffering. How good are you at letting go of grudges and accepting that some things are beyond your control? Take our quiz to find out!

Read the complete article

What can you do if your kid doesn't want to go back to school

What can you do if your kid doesn't want to go back to school?

What can you do if your kid doesn't want to go back to school? Here are our hints and tips to help if your child is expressing a refusal to go to school.

Read the complete article

Do you expect too much from others

Do you expect too much from others?

Do you expect more from others than they are prepared to give? Signs that you may be asking too much - and how to break the pattern.

Read the complete article

How to prove your value

How to prove your value

Feel like everyone takes you for granted? Whether it's working late to prepare a presentation or cooking a special birthday meal for your partner, it's nice to be appreciated when you've made an extra effort. And if it seems as if people don't notice, you might feel as if no one values you.

Read the complete article

Do you expect too much from others Find out!

Do you expect too much from others? Find out!

Most people are disappointed when others don't meet their expectations. But when you always expect too much, it isn't healthy, either for yourself or for others. If you often find yourself feeling let down by your loved ones or even by strangers, could it be that you have unrealistic ideas of how people should act?

Read the complete article

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