Negativity can take the pleasure out of life, and oftentimes we are our own worst enemy. If you are prone to a negative internal dialogue – one that influences what you say, do, think, feel or behave – and you are struggling to silence it, we have some tips for you that might just help to improve matters.
Understanding that having a positive mental attitude is a choice is the first stage in inculcating a new, happier you. You get to decide whether you want to be positive or negative about something. Of course, years of ingrained thinking, may well have you automatically reaching for a crabby, miserable response to a situation, but what you have to do is stop yourself, and choose to be positive. This takes a great deal of practice and it is certainly isn’t something you’ll achieve overnight. But to start with, just remember that you get to choose how you react to any situation or thought. You are in control.
You will struggle to feel positive in life if you surround yourself with negativity. The chances are, if you have previously been a negative person – someone who moaned and complained all the time, you will have attracted a very similar ilk of friend and acquaintance. Well, now you need to ditch that negativity from your life.
Negative people have a negative energy that will bring you down. They will tend to be judgemental and argumentative, and will not see the good in a situation. They will not want anyone to be happier than they are, even if they say otherwise. This will be incredibly hurtful to your chances of being positive. So distance yourself from these people and make new friends.
If it isn’t possible to change the people you are with – this could be your family or colleagues – then try and change the subject if you find the negativity is wearing you down. Introduce something positive, or skip away and ignore what is being said.
Believe it or not, your body and your mind are connected intrinsically and you can’t do anything with one that won’t affect the other. You can trick your mind into becoming more optimistic and positive by choosing to practice better body language. Shoulders up, head high, back straight, and smile. Keep your body open and welcoming, and your mind will be too!
Regardless of the situation you find yourself in, there will be some good to come out of it. Rather than be run down by bad experiences, search for what it can teach you, or seek out the positives. You may be stuck in traffic for an age, for example, but if this allows you to hear a radio programme or listen to a favourite piece of music, then you can turn this into a good moment. You may have a bad relationship and you feel your heart has been broken, but if you consider that you had some great times, met new people and learned new things, you’ll see there are positives too.
By keeping a journal and logging the things you are grateful for, you will rapidly move away from negativity and disappointment. The smallest things can be included in your notebook: you may have had a really lovely tomato with your lunch, or a sweet conversation with a neighbour, or you saw a rainbow, or heard some beautiful birdsong. It really doesn’t matter what it is, if it made you feel happy in that moment, list it in your gratitude journal and count your blessings. Practicing gratitude in this way can help to shift your perspective so that you are generally more positive and aware of what is going on around you.
Creating a positive environment is tricky because what seems positive for you, may not be for someone else. What’s a given, is that a cluttered, untidy or dirty space will not make you feel good. Funnily enough, sorting out, throwing out, and cleaning, are wonderful ways to help you feel more positive. De-junk your work and living space and give unwanted items to charity. Treat yourself to some new paint, or buy yourself some flowers. Place post-its or motivational posters somewhere you can see them, or simply have a favourite photo close by that makes you feel good.
Sometimes we become so self-absorbed we forget about everyone else. Focusing on the needs of another person is another great way to become more positive yourself. Think about what you can do for others, or even just one other person. You could consider volunteering for a charity, visiting an elderly or infirm neighbour, or walking someone else’s dog. Failing that, try and do one small kind thing per day for a complete stranger: pick up something they’ve dropped, buy them a coffee, or compliment someone on their hair or perfume.
You’re a human being, and like all human beings you have flaws. However, much more than that, you are incredible and you are an individual. There is no-one quite like you. Celebrate this fact and cherish who you are. Life is a party that you can’t attend twice, so live your life to the best of your ability, and enjoy!
Created by Tom Vermeersch (bio)
Tom Vermeersch is a certified Psychologist and Bach flower expert with more than 30 years of experience.
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Negativity can take the pleasure out of life, and oftentimes we are our own worst enemy. If you are prone to a negative internal dialogue – one that influences what you say, do, think, feel or behave – and you are struggling to silence it, we have some tips for you that might just help to improve matters.
Understanding that having a positive mental attitude is a choice is the first stage in inculcating a new, happier you. You get to decide whether you want to be positive or negative about something. Of course, years of ingrained thinking, may well have you automatically reaching for a crabby, miserable response to a situation, but what you have to do is stop yourself, and choose to be positive. This takes a great deal of practice and it is certainly isn’t something you’ll achieve overnight. But to start with, just remember that you get to choose how you react to any situation or thought. You are in control.
You will struggle to feel positive in life if you surround yourself with negativity. The chances are, if you have previously been a negative person – someone who moaned and complained all the time, you will have attracted a very similar ilk of friend and acquaintance. Well, now you need to ditch that negativity from your life.
Negative people have a negative energy that will bring you down. They will tend to be judgemental and argumentative, and will not see the good in a situation. They will not want anyone to be happier than they are, even if they say otherwise. This will be incredibly hurtful to your chances of being positive. So distance yourself from these people and make new friends.
If it isn’t possible to change the people you are with – this could be your family or colleagues – then try and change the subject if you find the negativity is wearing you down. Introduce something positive, or skip away and ignore what is being said.
Believe it or not, your body and your mind are connected intrinsically and you can’t do anything with one that won’t affect the other. You can trick your mind into becoming more optimistic and positive by choosing to practice better body language. Shoulders up, head high, back straight, and smile. Keep your body open and welcoming, and your mind will be too!
Regardless of the situation you find yourself in, there will be some good to come out of it. Rather than be run down by bad experiences, search for what it can teach you, or seek out the positives. You may be stuck in traffic for an age, for example, but if this allows you to hear a radio programme or listen to a favourite piece of music, then you can turn this into a good moment. You may have a bad relationship and you feel your heart has been broken, but if you consider that you had some great times, met new people and learned new things, you’ll see there are positives too.
By keeping a journal and logging the things you are grateful for, you will rapidly move away from negativity and disappointment. The smallest things can be included in your notebook: you may have had a really lovely tomato with your lunch, or a sweet conversation with a neighbour, or you saw a rainbow, or heard some beautiful birdsong. It really doesn’t matter what it is, if it made you feel happy in that moment, list it in your gratitude journal and count your blessings. Practicing gratitude in this way can help to shift your perspective so that you are generally more positive and aware of what is going on around you.
Creating a positive environment is tricky because what seems positive for you, may not be for someone else. What’s a given, is that a cluttered, untidy or dirty space will not make you feel good. Funnily enough, sorting out, throwing out, and cleaning, are wonderful ways to help you feel more positive. De-junk your work and living space and give unwanted items to charity. Treat yourself to some new paint, or buy yourself some flowers. Place post-its or motivational posters somewhere you can see them, or simply have a favourite photo close by that makes you feel good.
Sometimes we become so self-absorbed we forget about everyone else. Focusing on the needs of another person is another great way to become more positive yourself. Think about what you can do for others, or even just one other person. You could consider volunteering for a charity, visiting an elderly or infirm neighbour, or walking someone else’s dog. Failing that, try and do one small kind thing per day for a complete stranger: pick up something they’ve dropped, buy them a coffee, or compliment someone on their hair or perfume.
You’re a human being, and like all human beings you have flaws. However, much more than that, you are incredible and you are an individual. There is no-one quite like you. Celebrate this fact and cherish who you are. Life is a party that you can’t attend twice, so live your life to the best of your ability, and enjoy!
Nowadays, it can sometimes seem almost everyone has a mental health issue or learning disorder. But, are we too quick to label people, or is it that we are more aware of the problems? This article looks at some of the issues surrounding these sensitive questions.
For many people, 2020 has been one of the worst years they can remember. The COVID -19 pandemic and social unrest have changed our lives in ways we would not have believed possible a year ago. And when January 2021 comes around, we're still likely to be facing many challenges. Can 2021 be a better year?
Read the complete article
Some people are overly sensitive to the time change and it can take days, if not weeks, for them to feel right again, while others barely even notice.
Read the complete article
Do you feel you’re always criticising and judging everyone, yourself included? Do you feel bad about it afterwards? You’re certainly not alone! Read on to discover how you can judge less and start to accept things the way they are.
Millions of people furloughed for months are now being recalled to work. Others, who have been working from home throughout the lockdown, are returning to the office. And some jobs have simply disappeared: many people are facing redundancy and will soon have to cope with job hunting. Going back to work after an unprecedented length of time at home is quite a challenge.
It is not always obvious when someone is experiencing depression. Some people with depression mask their symptoms, hiding their feelings behind a smile to convince others they are happy.
Do you sometimes feel your achievements are not the result of your hard work and skill but are just luck? And do you fear that one day, someone will reveal you as an imposter or fraud? You might have imposter syndrome!
Going back to school during a pandemic is a new experience for everyone, and it's understandable if children are feeling anxious about it. We take a look at some of the issues and how you can help your child to get ready for returning to the classroom.
Since the outbreak of the COVID-19 pandemic, governments around the world have taken unprecedented measures to stop the spread of coronavirus. The rapid changes we've seen have had an impact on almost every aspect of our lives.
Headaches can be a real nuisance, especially if you get them frequently. Luckily, there are many natural ways to prevent and relieve headaches without needing to reach for over the counter medication.
Bach Flowers are not medicinal but harmless plant extracts which are used to support health.
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Are you unsure which Bach flowers can help you? Contact Tom for free advice.
