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Many children and young people have trouble sitting still and staying focused.
In the majority of cases it’s a temporary blip and nothing to worry about, after all they have a lot of energy that they need to burn off, and so focusing on a task, such as homework or reading, may not be their biggest priority.
On the other hand, learning to concentrate and sticking with something is a skill everyone needs as an adult.
If your child is slapdash it means they are not paying enough attention to detail. Sometimes the most creative ideas-driven people start out this way, but while generating ideas is wonderful, they eventually do need the ability to look at the nitty-gritty, so that they can execute their ideas in the long term.
Childhood is a time for learning and experimentation, but if your child makes many errors, particularly repetitive mistakes even after further instruction from you or a teacher, then there may be an issue. If you know that your child understands the instructions being given, but then is flippant or ignores what you say, pay attention. Your child is struggling to stay focused.
You may agree an activity with your child and then find that their attention is rapidly drawn elsewhere. They may be colouring one minute but suddenly want to play outside, or watch the TV instead. Their focus has disappeared.
Your child has probably learned to appease you and stay quiet when you talk to him or her. However, you can probably tell whether s/he is listening to what you are saying, and whether that information is being processed. If you ask, “Did you hear what I said?” they will answer in the affirmative. If you test them, you’ll find they didn’t actually hear what you said and can’t act on it.
The reverse of number 4 above, is that your child may listen and hear what is said, but cannot then remember or follow instructions. They may not keep what you said in their short term memory long enough to act on it. A similar symptom of trouble focusing, is where your child loses or misplaces things. Often this is not intentional, but can be frustrating for all concerned.
Another sign that your child is having trouble staying focused is if s/he cannot seem to organise themselves ahead of time. They may not be able to pack their school bag the evening before for example, or they may be unable to complete projects that they’ve started. Their room may be a complete mess, or they may struggle with writing etc.
Children who have trouble focussing tend to be easily bored. This links in with the need to constantly change activities, and their slapdash approach to life. It’s something for you to look out for.
If your child is struggling to focus, there are a few things you can try to do that might help them. While this time in their development is frustrating for you, your patience will pay dividends. Remember that your child has far too much energy and they need to burn it off. Get them out and about, doing something physical. Try and wear them out a little before you get them to sit down and concentrate on the task in hand. Team sports are great, but a trip to the park or the beach will work just as well.
Block out all distractions as far as possible. This means dealing with your child alone, with no other stimuli around: no people, no TV, no phone, no radio etc. Don’t talk to your child when they are thinking. Provide clear instruction, and make to-do lists with your child, and always encourage them. Have a series of rewards to offer them when they complete their tasks in order. Make sure your child has enough breaks so that they can recharge their batteries, and allow them to expend more energy if they need to.
Created by Tom Vermeersch (bio)
Tom Vermeersch is a certified Psychologist and Bach flower expert with more than 30 years of experience.
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Many children and young people have trouble sitting still and staying focused.
In the majority of cases it’s a temporary blip and nothing to worry about, after all they have a lot of energy that they need to burn off, and so focusing on a task, such as homework or reading, may not be their biggest priority.
On the other hand, learning to concentrate and sticking with something is a skill everyone needs as an adult.
If your child is slapdash it means they are not paying enough attention to detail. Sometimes the most creative ideas-driven people start out this way, but while generating ideas is wonderful, they eventually do need the ability to look at the nitty-gritty, so that they can execute their ideas in the long term.
Childhood is a time for learning and experimentation, but if your child makes many errors, particularly repetitive mistakes even after further instruction from you or a teacher, then there may be an issue. If you know that your child understands the instructions being given, but then is flippant or ignores what you say, pay attention. Your child is struggling to stay focused.
You may agree an activity with your child and then find that their attention is rapidly drawn elsewhere. They may be colouring one minute but suddenly want to play outside, or watch the TV instead. Their focus has disappeared.
Your child has probably learned to appease you and stay quiet when you talk to him or her. However, you can probably tell whether s/he is listening to what you are saying, and whether that information is being processed. If you ask, “Did you hear what I said?” they will answer in the affirmative. If you test them, you’ll find they didn’t actually hear what you said and can’t act on it.
The reverse of number 4 above, is that your child may listen and hear what is said, but cannot then remember or follow instructions. They may not keep what you said in their short term memory long enough to act on it. A similar symptom of trouble focusing, is where your child loses or misplaces things. Often this is not intentional, but can be frustrating for all concerned.
Another sign that your child is having trouble staying focused is if s/he cannot seem to organise themselves ahead of time. They may not be able to pack their school bag the evening before for example, or they may be unable to complete projects that they’ve started. Their room may be a complete mess, or they may struggle with writing etc.
Children who have trouble focussing tend to be easily bored. This links in with the need to constantly change activities, and their slapdash approach to life. It’s something for you to look out for.
If your child is struggling to focus, there are a few things you can try to do that might help them. While this time in their development is frustrating for you, your patience will pay dividends. Remember that your child has far too much energy and they need to burn it off. Get them out and about, doing something physical. Try and wear them out a little before you get them to sit down and concentrate on the task in hand. Team sports are great, but a trip to the park or the beach will work just as well.
Block out all distractions as far as possible. This means dealing with your child alone, with no other stimuli around: no people, no TV, no phone, no radio etc. Don’t talk to your child when they are thinking. Provide clear instruction, and make to-do lists with your child, and always encourage them. Have a series of rewards to offer them when they complete their tasks in order. Make sure your child has enough breaks so that they can recharge their batteries, and allow them to expend more energy if they need to.
We simply can’t avoid noticing the changes all around us. Autumn is here... Autumn is also called a transitional season. Slowly and steadily, it prepares us for the transition...
Read the complete article
Everyone is unique, even in their own bad habits or negative traits. Here are some tips to balance those negative traits in our new article!
It's not always easy to tell if someone has depression. While some signs such as sadness, pessimism and withdrawal from social interaction are easy to recognise, other symptoms may be less obvious. And some people are very good at hiding their depression - even from themselves!
People always think: that’s just me. I'm not good at 'X', that is just my character. Here are some reasons why it's never too late to change.
Read the complete article
What can you do if your kid doesn't want to go back to school? Here are our hints and tips to help if your child is expressing a refusal to go to school.
Feeling blue? You're not alone! We all feel sad at times; it's a normal human emotion. Sometimes, it's clear to see what has triggered our depression. Common reasons for feeling sad include bereavement, the end of a relationship, losing your job or money problems. But it's not always so clearcut.
Your relationship ends, or you lose your job, and you get stuck in a rut of negative thoughts and suffering. How good are you at letting go of grudges and accepting that some things are beyond your control? Take our quiz to find out!
Read the complete article
Do you expect more from others than they are prepared to give? Signs that you may be asking too much - and how to break the pattern.
Motivation can be somewhat elusive - some days, you just can't seem to make yourself do the stuff you don't want to. But putting things off just leads to stress, frustration and a sense of guilt.
Do you always feel that everything’s always going wrong? Find out how to stop this cycle of bad thoughts in its tracks. When you think positively, things will start to appear positive and you will eventually feel more positive and optimistic.
Bach Flowers are not medicinal but harmless plant extracts which are used to support health.
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Are you unsure which Bach flowers can help you? Contact Tom for free advice.

